123456.
1234.
123.
It’s two—your number is two. Bingo?!
As we rode back from the play, our friend Eric Chen seemed to predict our cards’ numbers every time in our game of Canadian Fish. Sure, he wasn’t always right, but the probability of him guessing correctly as much as he did seemed low, way too low. There was no way that he was just guessing. Consequently, some of us leapt to the conclusion that he was cheating: in some way, he had seen our cards and was trying to take full advantage of his fortune.
Skeptical, we decided to put him to the test, asking him to guess a random number in a given range. Time and time again, he could pinpoint our number, rarely erring. How?
Did we had a mind reader within our midst? Maybe. Or was he doing something right after all? In that moment, our answer was quick and strong: hell no. There must have been something else.
Looking back at that moment, how was Eric doing what he was doing? Was he truly reading our minds? Is that even possible?
Some sources have doubts, stating that the closest thing would be analyzing visual and auditory cues of a person’s body language, words, and expressed emotions. Other sources cited monkeys with a more optimistic view of mind reading. Perhaps special neurons in the amygdala—the fear factory of the brain—are responsible for learning from other monkeys. Or maybe mirror neurons in the premotor cortex reflect the actions, sensations, and emotions of another monkey. Scientists have used these questions to form hypotheses to study social learning with conditions like autism, analyzing the relationship between the presence of these special neurons and observed learning capabilities.
Do those theories suggest that mind reading is a possibility? Yes and no. The mind reading that we may envision straight out of the latest science fiction movie will most likely never make it out into the light of reality. However, our abilities to read humans—observing body language and expression especially—will continue to get better, gradually inching towards what we might picture when we think of mind reading.
So how can you unlock your secret ability—your ability to read other human beings? According to scientists, there are concrete ways in which you can read other people in order to make conclusions on their thoughts and emotions. There’s one skill that underlies most of these methods: listening.
I’m sure that many of you have heard that listening is important, but for reading other people, listening is more than that: it’s everything. Only when you listen can you pick up on their background, their personalities, their desires, and their goals. Only when you listen can you deduct their emotions, flooding from their tone and vocalization. As Loren Miner—COO of Decision Toolbox—says, “you have to have big ears and a small mouth.” Essentially, listen before you talk. Consider the other person or the audience before you make your conclusions.
Sure, learning to read verbal cues doesn’t sound that bad. But what about nonverbal hints, body language? What movements or expressions should you look for, and what exactly do they tell you?
According to Fremont College, described below are two of the most common movements to consider and their meanings. If you want to read the full list outlined by Fremont College, you can read it at their article on reading body language.
Eyes: I’m sure that you’ve heard some of the first signs that I’m about to tell you. A person who doesn’t make eye contact with you is not interested or genuine in their motives, and if they look downwards they generally feel nervous or lack self-confidence. When people are drawn in by what you are saying, their pupils dilate; when they are stressed, their blinking rate may increase.
The next signs might seem obvious to you: the direction of a person’s eye elucidate their next desire or action. A person looking at the door might want to leave. A person looking at another person is awaiting a conversation between them. A person looking at the clock might be bored at what you’re saying.
Now comes the signs that I found the most interesting and absurd: if a person looks up to the right when thinking, they are generally lying, and if a person looks up to the left in the same situation, they are generally telling the truth. I can’t say that I know for sure how and why this is the case, but I’m sure that this surprises you as much as it surprises me (and next time you lie, make sure to look left).
Head: The way in which a person holds or moves their head is another obvious way in which you can read their body language. Generally, their speed of head movement communicates just how interested they are in what you have to say. Faster head movements are more indicative that they just want you to stop talking. Taking the hint then can help you communicate and connect better.
The tilt of a person’s head further shows their interest. As you may expect, leaning inwards shows interest, while leaning back can show disinterest or a lack of trust.
Why is it so important to be able to read others? Well, if you want to connect effectively with your audience, you have to consider your audience with this goal in mind.
If you consider their actions and expressions, you can learn more about what they are feeling and thinking, giving you a better understanding of your surroundings in a process commonly known as “reading the room.” The importance of this action cannot be overstressed. As Annie McKee from the University of Pennsylvania states, understanding others is the only way to build trust, a prerequisite to getting things done.
We may not need to be perfect mind readers. However, learning to understand others is a must; only when you understand others can you truly connect with them and their minds.
Works Cited
Denworth, Lydia. “Mind Reading.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 2019, www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/mind-reading.
Denworth, Lydia. “The Role of ‘Mindreading’ Neurons.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 11 Apr. 2019, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/brain-waves/201904/the-role-mindreading-neurons.
“How to Read Body Language – Revealing Secrets Behind Nonverbal Cues.” Fremont College, 8 Mar. 2018, fremont.edu/how-to-read-body-language-revealing-the-secrets-behind-common-nonverbal-cues/.
Knight, Rebecca. “Tips for Reading the Room Before a Meeting or Presentation.” Harvard Business Review, 30 July 2018, hbr.org/2018/05/tips-for-reading-the-room-before-a-meeting-or-presentation.
Than, Ker. “Scientists Say Everyone Can Read Minds.” LiveScience, Purch, 27 Apr. 2005, www.livescience.com/220-scientists-read-minds.html.
Vozza, Stephanie. “Five Ways To Read Someone’s Mind.” Fast Company, Fast Company, 24 Aug. 2015, www.fastcompany.com/3049746/five-ways-to-read-someones-mind.
Hey Josh – intriguing post!
I had the blessed opportunity of witnessing the events depicted in your introduction. In fact, I think Mr. Chen was randomly guessing numbers and creating a fake act, as my repeated choice of the number one (depicted by one special finger over and over) eventually stumped the self-proclaimed mind reader in seconds.
However, I do agree that the art of mind reading is somewhat spectral in nature: there may not be people guessing your social security number at a glance, but understanding and connecting with others socially can easily pass for something somewhat similar.
Perhaps your intro, instead of mind reading, is more fit for my thought process when guessing on the math Scibowl tryouts today (except the bingo part…)
Hi Jason,
I also came to the conclusion that Eric was randomly guessing numbers, but there was a point at which he had gotten a string of correct guesses and I thought he might actually be using some data as a springboard for his guesses. Nonetheless, it was definitely entertaining to watch. Also, I’m relatively confident that your claim of guessing on those scibowl math tryout questions will turn out to be more unbelievable than Eric’s claims after you “guess” all of those questions right.
This mind reading post really catches my attention! I also think this really relates to catching lies from others. I always see those silly Snapchats that are like “which person is lying?!!?” and they’ve slowly become easier and easier. Even when texting my friends, it’s so easy to tell when they’re lying about being upset.
Great post overall Josh, love the topic!
Hey Erin,
I agree that our ability to read our friends and their emotions through what they say or write is a form of mind reading. When we get to know someone as well as we may know a friend, we tend to pick up on their patterns that indicate how they are feeling at a particular moment. Learning to pick up on these signs from strangers can be similar in how pattern recognition is necessary, although there may be less to pick up a pattern from.