Holy cow. Never did I think that senior year would come so fast. I remember me being in elementary school wondering what the number 22 meant on one of the standardized tests. My teacher told us it was the year we graduated high school. I thought, “wow that’s in a long time!”. Everyone says high school flies by in the blink of an eye. I never believed it because once freshman year hit and I took my first final I said to myself, “I still have 3 more years of this”. The amount of dread I had to get through high school makes me so disappointed in myself. This is senior year. Like we are here right now, about to finish high school. My biggest regret is not taking it all in while I should’ve. Looking back, I think of all of the learning experiences that I had. From failed tests to getting my first A on a math test. All of those feelings came once in high school, and although a failed test may have sucked, it developed who I am today.
Personally, throughout high school, I have learned about what type of learner I am. I have struggled with English classes since day 1. I have been put into many strategic reading classes to help me with getting a better understanding of English. I started freshman year in the academic reading class as well as English 1. Then I excelled out of strategic reading and went into English 2. In my junior year, I decided to maybe take a challenge. I started honor English 3, and ended up with a B+ both semesters. I was extremely proud of myself because I got the weighted credit and it helped me get a 4.0 in high school. I finally ended up here, in AP literature, with a grade that is so close to an A. Never would I have thought freshman year, me in academic reading, I would be in an AP English class, and doing well in it. My progress with moving up with English classes showed me as a learner that I am capable of pushing myself and succeeding. I connect well with most of my teachers and reach out to them when I need to because I want to make sure that they know that I am trying my best to be the learner I am today. This semester, I am ending again with a 4.0, if all my finals go as they should, and I am extremely proud of myself for taking the risk to push myself.
Like I was saying before, I do have a lot of regrets throughout high school. Especially now looking back because I know there is a lot more than I was capable of and didn’t do. One thing that I would suggest to incoming seniors is something that everyone says, don’t take high school for granted, live in the moment. As much as you may hate finals, for me, this is my last time EVER taking a high school final. As much relief as that may sound, it sucks. It’s not that I am sad that I am not taking finals next semester, but it is the idea that I am growing up. Elementary me never thought this would really happen. I have always looked at life like what if something happened and I don’t make it to the next big thing. And as horrible as that may sound, it does cross my mind because I feel like there is always a catch. But no, this time, it is here. We are graduating in almost 5 months. Unreal. All of the fun high school get-togethers, gone. Done. Like, remember last weekend? That won’t happen again. It is a very psychological thing, memories only happen one time. Make the most of them. I wish it was pushed more to take the small moments in more because it is something that I wish I did more. But at least I have another semester to do so.
On a side note, I love what our school does for seniors. First of all, I have played volleyball for all 4 years of high school. I have always looked up to my seniors because they just seemed so cool. I was so excited to be part of the program this year and be that person that I looked up to ever since I was a freshman. On our senior night, all of the senior players were pulled into the conference room to just talk to the coaches and discuss our future plans as well as have a few laughs. We got dismissed and the moment we walked into the contest gym and saw all the posters, streamers, balloons, tears streamed down our faces. It has never hit me more than that day that I was a senior. It was the most unreal feeling ever and such a reality check. I am also a part of the senior board and we coordinate a lot of the senior events. I planned the senior rolling skating event and it was extremely fun. Our theme was senior citizens and everyone dressed so well. I am glad we have a few more events like that because it is a great way to get everyone together.
Overall, my senior year has been something I looked forward to for so long. I wanted it to come so bad, but now, my biggest wish is for life to slow down. Although I am excited to pursue the things in my future and choose between the 2 colleges I want to go to, I miss being little and looking up to the big kids. Now I am a big kid.
Hey Aiyana! I loved reading your reflection so much. I totally get you- like where did all the time go? It’s crazy how fast high school flew by. The moment you brought up about you asking your teacher what 22 meant was super relatable. Senior year felt sooooo far away even when we were just in middle school. I’m so glad you’ve discovered the type of learner you are. That’s definitely a great accomplishment! It’s crazy- I also have always struggled with English classes ever since I was young. You should be so proud that you’ve come this far with English though:)) It’s important to live without regrets just like you were saying. This past semester has surely taught me that lesson. Even though it is sad realizing that we’re growing up so quickly, let’s make the most of the rest of senior year!!!
I loved what you said about our lasts. Sure the memory only happens once and thinking back on the best moments of this year will be sad, but it’s more important to be happy because it happened and not be sad because it’s over. This year has been great and something to remember. The fact that we are graduating on that scary day, May 22nd, seems like such a foriegn day, but in reality, this is our lives. We are entering that odd age where we are still kids, or at least I feel like one, but we aren’t really kids, we are entering that weird stage of adulthood. But the best advice I have heard is, “this year is going to be the quickest year of your high school experience, and with that, put down your phone, stop thinking about the sadness of our lasts and graduation, and live in the moment”, hearing this advice carried me through the first semester. I know it’s cliche and easier said than done, but living in the moment rather than using your phone to capture a video you probably will never do anything with and just live, makes life much better and happier. Best of luck for you nest semester!
Hi Aiyana,
It’s amazing how you improved in English! Unlike many other subjects, english has always been a hard subject for me to study for. I definitely agree with your point about living in the moment. During the schoolyear, I often fixate on what needs to get done. There’ve honestly been so many missed opportunities where I could’ve been making memorable moments, rather than stressing myself out. And lastly, it’s super cool that you’ve been involved in something at school for all four years of high school. I’m sure you’ve created invaluable friendships and seen yourself, as well as your team, grown!