I think by now the class of Ms. Hitzeman’s third period AP Lit have figured out that when I don’t really know what I’m doing for my blog posts, I just write love letters to inanimate objects in my life that are sometimes more emotionally available than high school boys.
This isn’t a callout post, I promise.
Tonight’s issue of Zea’s Hopeless Romanticism of Inanimate Objects is dedicated to the one, the only… Bernadette.
If you haven’t read the latest post of the lovely Willow Nagai, then I suggest you do so right now. Because yes, it did inspire me and remind me of my one true love: her car, Bernadette. Yes, this blog entry will expose the truth. I am only friends with Willow because of her amazing car.
Okay, not really. I do unironically love Willow, one of my newfound dear friends. I’ve just come to love her car a teeny bit more. Delightfully labeled with a green-and-pink license plate and armed with maternally-toned alarming beeping whenever I don’t buckle in my seatbelt (a terrible habit I obtained during my six-year stay in Indonesia), Bernadette successfully managed to charm her way into my heart in the span of less than five car rides. 
If you look really closely, you can peep the sneak peek of Costco in the far left(?) window. And yes, this does confirm that this photo was taken during the famous trip to stock up Willow’s locker with snacks for the first time. You may now take this post as confirmation that all of the AP Lit blog posts are connected in one vast cinematic universe.
I now officially start my post with these words: Dear Bernadette,
In the four – August, September, October, now November – months that I’ve gotten to know you, you’ve quickly become central to my senior year experience with Miss Nagai and Miss Mansoor. The trips I’ve taken in you have included (but are not limited to):
- Chipotle. Many, many times. The discovery of their cheese quesadillas and my subsequent introduction of them to your driver may have triggered a somewhat unhealthy addiction to the cheesy goodness. Seriously, for those of you reading this post: you need to try the quesadillas at Chipotle (not the Kids’ Meal ones)
- Note that one of these trips may or may not have been the reason I was subsequently ten minutes late to my AP French class.
- The Illinois Vintage Fest! A marvelous half-hour trip taken last week just before Halloween, this was probably the longest ride I’ve ever taken in Bernadette – and yes, I may or may not be making a blog post about this in the next couple of weeks.
- The Naperville Riverwalk Art Fair – and yes, this is a throwback to one of my earlier posts about a month ago
- This was actually my first ever trip in Bernadette outside of the school hours
- Downtown Naperville, most notably during sixth period lunch on the very first day of school
Even stationary, you are ever a delight to be in. As the days get colder and the NNHS courtyard becomes less and less appealing to sit in during lunch, many-a post-AP Chemistry lunch period has been spent simply in your presence and enjoying lunch in your seats.
For you fun readers wondering, yes, there does exist videos of me on my phone in Bernadette, unawares to Willow’s recording of my visage. No, I will not be posting any such video(s). Yes, maybe Willow will show them to you if you ask nicely.
Admittedly, I have snatched the keys of Bernadette from Willow on days where I may or may not have a blended fourth period (shoutout to Advanced Media Lab for conveniently scheduling those for me!). And yes, there may be a slight chance that those fourth periods in Bernadette were spent watching lab videos for the next period. In case you couldn’t tell, I’m always prepared for that class.
Admittedly, I do dread Bernadette’s chilly interior as the fall season starts to draw to a close and the vicious Illinois winters begin to come into play – although I don’t think that will stop me from joining WIllow in her after impromptu meetups at the Pisces Cafe.
Of course, there’s no better way to end this post/love letter than with an image sent to me by Willow herself, taken from Bernadette’s favorite parking spot in front of the rather iconic pothole in front of my complex.
Maybe the pothole will be gone by the time I get this post up.
Editor’s note: I just checked. The pothole is not gone.
Hello Zea,
I actually let out a vaguely inhumane snort as I read through this love letter. It is magical, mystical, and a wonderful raving of the lovely Bernadette.
While I have not gotten to meet the mystical being herself I feel like I knew her through the course of your writing. All the lovely trips and time within Bernadette seem like incredible adventures indeed and I can tell she is a very valuable friend through the seasons (do you turn the heat on in winter?) and through all periods (AP Chem must have a lot of work huh) I particularly enjoyed your photo evidence and of course Bernadette’s POV of the Pothole. And specifically the trips you guys have taken- (A VINTAGE FEST?! AND ART FAIR where do you find that all these events are happening?!?!- that sounds so cool) and Chipotle- I’m going to try the quesadilla today). You and Bernadette are living your high school lives to the fullest. In all wonderful, spectacular, splendorous, your love letter to Bernadette touched my soul- and will probably make me an avid Chipotle quesadilla consumer.
Hey Zea, I want to say that this post hit me deep as well because my family used to have this old, green honda that I had many memories in as well. When I read about all your adventures in Bernadette, it reminded me of all the fun times I would have with my family in the green honda. We would drive all around naperville to the local parks and restaurants in the car and my parents told me that the car could eventually be mine. Unfortunately, not everything will last forever and the car eventually broke down. I was devastated when it happened because it was the first car I ever rode in and I felt a connection to it. It had a distinct smell and the gray interior was so recognizable to me. But back to your post, I think its amazing how you connect so much with a car that isnt yours and its great how you can make these connections. Great job on the post!
Hi Zea!!
I loved reading your blog because I feel that I can relate so much to the adventures that you have had in your friend’s car! Before I got my license, I felt trapped by my parents and I really wasn’t able to hang out with my friends as much or do the things that I wanted to do. However, when I finally turned sixteen, it was like my eyes opened to the endless opportunities that I had with my car. I fell in love with my car, as I quickly became the designated driver of my friend group and viewed my car as something that always led to a good time. Not only does hanging out with my friends in my car make me love it so much, but also just being alone during late-night drives. I cannot express the relaxation and therapy that being in my car alone and listening to music gives me when I need a break from the rest of the world, so I love being in the comfort of my jeep renegade. In all, I really enjoyed your blog post because, although it is not your own car that you are in love with, I can still relate to how much you love being in a car with friends.
I love your love letters :)))
Hi Zea this blog was so funny! I enjoyed reading this tremendously, I love your creativity! Bernadette seems like the best first car to have and I am so happy you recall memories in the car. I loveeee how you explained your Chipotle and Costco trips and overall love how you discussed Bernadette’s true utilization. I thought it was funny how you included phrases in parenthesis it added necessary sarcasticness which made me understand your writing styles and personality. Bernadette reminds me of our family’s Lexus we’ve had since I was just born. The number of road trips and significant memories that are immersed in that vehicle is too many to count. I remember when we sold it, it was magically gone from our garage, and my sister and I wouldn’t talk to our parents for a couple of days, we simply couldn’t believe our eyes. The new owners will never understand what adventures took place in the car and probably are wondering the same thing while the purple marker is carelessly scribbled on the interior of their car, as well as the broken left tv because my sister thought it would be funny to smash my head against it to silence me while she enjoyed her slumber. I am convinced first cars are your best friend. I am regretting not naming the Lexus now, Bernadette is so unique!
Zea,
I think a love letter to an inadement object is such a cute idea. Just that thought alone got me thinking of all the inadement objects I’m thankful for, and that they too deserve love letters. Top one: my bed. Second: my backpack (I throw it around a lot). Third, my heater (my room is the only one above 60 degrees in my house thanks to my space heater). Fourth, my running shoes (those poor, poor shoes). Finally, my own car, Lexi. In the spirit of Thanksgiving, this was a very well timed read. Just as I am thankful for human relationships, I am also thankful for the many items that make my life more comfortable. I am truely privilaged.