Ted Bundy could totally get it…
apparently.
Yes, he killed and raped over 30 women. Yes, he crossed state lines and terrorized the nation for 4 years. Yes, women every where lived in fear that at any moment they too would be taken, ripped from their families and never seen again.
But to many women there’s something about the guy.
Ted Bundy is still prevalent in pop culture, remaining one of the most prolific serial killers of all time. Not because of the quantity of people he murdered or the size of his hunting grounds, but because of his charming demeanor, strong features and studies of hybristophilia that resulted from the phenomena.
Hybristophilia is when sexual arousal occurs when with a physically attractive partner known to have committed an act that would be considered a social outrage such as cheating and lying or some kind of crime—such as rape, armed robbery or murder.
https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/what-is-hybristophilia
DISCLAIMER FOR THE PURPOSES OF THIS BLOG I AM HIGHLIGHTING THE EFFECTS OF HYBRISTOPHILIA ON WOMEN IN RELATIONSHIPS WITH MEN AND I AM AWARE THAT WOMEN TOO CAN BE TOXIC AND THE ABUSERS IN RELATIONSHIPS THANK YOU.
After Bundy’s capture, thousands of women professed their total love for him, dying their hair brown and switching to a middle part (to match his victim preference), and sending money, encouragement, and explicit images of themselves to help him ‘pass the time’ behind bars.
As court reporter Bill Hicks explained the, “Courtroom for Ted Bundy’s trial [was] packed with women, trying to meet him and give him love letters and wedding-fucking-proposals …and the first thought that enters my mind is, ‘And I’m not getting laid. What am I doing wrong?’”
Bundy isn’t alone in this phenomena either. Jeffery Dhamer, Charles Schmid, Richard Ramirez, Paul John Knowles, Andrew Phillip Cunanan, even H.H Homes. All accused of some of the most vile, disturbing, and animalistic acts, and none with a death tally under 10.
So what is it that makes women shudder at the thought of a guy under six feet, but over look capital murder charges?
According to American Physiological Association Associate Dr. Judy Ho, women often “want to be the special person that can turn [a] life around and be able to attribute that to their own self esteem.” Essentially, Dr. Ho is saying that the “playing the savior” makes women wild. Most of these women truly believe that they can make ‘bad boys’ seek repentance and change for the better, falling for projects instead of nice guys in order to feel greater self value. Pretty fucked up right?
Also, there is the societal trope that “he’s mean because he likes you.” We all remember kindergarten where a boy would throw mulch at some girl and some teacher’s aide or monitor would respond “Boys will be boys” or “he just likes you.” Sure it may seem like a stretch that little Jenny from the playground would grow up and pine over Dahmer, but fast forward 10 years and she’ll be apologizing to and defending the guy that cheated on her… twice. When society normalizes bad or aggressive behavior it minimizes the red flags enabling hybristophilia.
This double standard, that boys can just get angry or can’t control/understand their emotions makes girls not realize that you should expect to be treated well, romantically or not. It’s normal for doors to be opened, text to be responded to and chrivary to be shown. Overall, it’s on us as a society to set the standard by which we treat each other and denormalize the ‘bad boy’ trope.
Further, we as a society glorify these men. Heartthrob Zac Effron as Ted Bundy. Ross Lynch as Dahmer. Joe from YOU. Hello? Are we trying to make serial killers look good here? The more we idealize these individuals based on the subjective the less people look at the monstrosity of their
crimes. We can’t make it normal to only judge the outside, epically not in these extremes.
So maybe he has a charming smile, so maybe high school has just lowered your standards that much (kidding), there is so much more to a guy than the way he looks or the two times a month his nice to you. Maybe its time that we as a society start honoring that and look more on the inside than outside.
Hey Cush,
I find this blog so interesting! I took sociology last semester, and we watched the Ted Bundy movie on Netflix with Zac Efron. It was really cool to watch because it gave me a better understanding of how Ted Bundy was able to get away with so much, and how he almost didn’t get caught.
I find it truly sad how someone’s good looks can blind their perception of how good a person that they are, because a man like him who was so scary and violent deserved to not be appreciated by other people. I really enjoyed reading your blog because I never knew that there was a name (Hybristophila) for this. This really is a cool concept to learn more about, because it seems so un-natural but it has been really prevalent in the past.