Recently I’ve been watching a plethora of videos regarding self improvement tips. For example, how to be fearless under pressure, tips for extreme confidence, how to read body language, not caring what others think, etc. These videos aren’t necessarily entertaining, yet seem to fascinate me. I want to learn the importance of body language and how it reflects what you’re feeling far more than the context of your dialogue. Learning about confidence also gives me an opportunity to practice these techniques until they become my nature, and I eventually  don’t have to think about them so much.

Confidence

My confidence has always been a trait that I’m proud of. Although, there are moments where I’m truly just acting confident and not feeling it. Learning how to be confident is crucial. You are able to trust yourself and know you are able to handle any situation thrown at you act in a calm manner. I watched several videos on confidence and I narrowed it down to tips that seemed common throughout all of them.

1. Eye contact: being able to maintain eye contact can be threatening for others, but that isn’t really the sole purpose of it. It shows you’re engaged in the conversation and you’re an active listener. It makes one seem assertive and sincere. I love eye contact and have been practicing it a lot lately and seeing how others react. They either hold eye contact with me or glance away constantly as most people do.
2. Relaxed body language: make sure your body is comfortable wherever you go. It shows that you aren’t really threatened. Don’t slouch, keep your shoulders up. Keep your head up as you walk, and shoulders back as well. Doing so makes you more present and more prepared to take on any interaction with confidence
3. Your walk: this goes with the tip above but as stated previously, keep your shoulders back and head up. Some think walking slow means confidence but it does the exact opposite. Walking slow 24/7 gives the impression that you have nothing better to do or go. Walk with a purpose- just walk at a good, faster pace.
4. Slow your movement: this might seem contradicting to the tip #3 , but this applies to small every day to day movements such as hand gestures or picking up something off the ground. Being slow for simple activities shows you have everything under control and that you’re not anxious.
5. Being un-reactive: we tend to constantly want to talk over others and make sure WE get to talk. Get out of this habit and start taking time to construct your responses. This makes you less eager and shows you’re an active listener. Staying calm and not being so anxious to react gives you more time to think before you speak, which genuinely is very important to start doing. What we say and how we say it at any given moment has a lot of power.

Not caring what others think

I usually don’t care what people think, but I’m not at the point where I don’t care completely. There are defiantly situations where you do need peoples opinions whether that be in the workplace or school, although we seem to care what people think for all aspects of our lives. What we wear, post, say, do, is influenced by what others will say or what you assume they will say. I watched a couple YouTube videos on this and it came down to one thing: self reliance. Not seeking validation from others, trusting you, yourself, and I. This can be for simple things such as sending a picture of your outfit to your friends asking if it’s good enough. Trust yourself enough to make decisions for yourself. If you think about it a lot, it does make sense, and I’m starting to practice this self reliance thing more and more. I’m beginning to trust what I want to do without worrying about the opinion/insight of those around me.