Parks and Recreation, Season 4, Episode 4, Minute 5:33
At this moment, iconic and unforgettable words were spoken. Just three simple words. Yet, while only a few words, they are the essence of my entirely new mindset.
The iconic line, straight from Tom Haverford himself.
Treat Yo Self.
That’s right, you heard me. If you’ve ever seen this show, you know which episode I’m talking about. Two-coworkers, Tom and Donna, celebrate their best day of the year, which is all about self care. They spend the entire day getting their nails done, shopping, eating, getting massages, and being completely vocal about it to all their friends.
I absolutely love this show, and I would never intentionally criticize two of my favorite all time characters unless absolutely necessary. And unfortunately in this case, it’s necessary.
Just like in this show, many people think that they can just cram all their self-care into one day and be perfectly fine. And while this may be more convenient, it’s not very effective. Many people either fail to see why this isn’t the right mindset or they just ignore the idea of it all together.
The reality is that our mental health is something we always need to be in tune with. With our busy lives, it’s very easy to get overwhelmed from all the stress we endue on a daily basis. Without taking time for ourselves to relax and just breath, we can start sinking deep down into a hole of despair where we feel consistently hopeless, stressed, and depressed.
A few years ago, I was struggling with these negative emotions because I was completely overworking myself without any breaks. It made me have no energy, I struggled to fall asleep at night, and I even lost my appetite at times. It wasn’t until I started making some simple changes in my own life, that I started to achieve that healthy balance that I was looking for.
Now I promise you, self-care doesn’t have to be as complex and time-consuming as it may seem coming from influencers or celebrities. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to go to the gym for 2 hours every day, have salad for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and drink 100 ounces of water by noon in order to say you practice self care.
Don’t believe me? Let me show you. Here are my top five self-care suggestions for de-stressing that have been very effective in my own life.
1.Do Nothing
I know, I know maybe even reading those two words makes you antsy. We’re always doing something, whether it’s doing homework, checking emails, or scrolling through social media. But I want to challenge you to do something that has no real thought at all. Put your work and your phone down, and watch an episode of TV, pet your dog, or color. It doesn’t have to be for very long, even fifteen minutes would be beneficial. By giving yourself a mental break, you’re allowing your body and brain to destress and reset, and this period of relaxation— even if relatively short— is very effective in lowering your body’s stress both mentally and physically.
This is my personal favorite order from Starbucks, that I get when I’m particularly stressed. It’s a venti strawberry refresher with lemonade and light ice. 11/10 would recommend
2. Buy yourself that Starbucks drink or eat that ice cream for dessert
If you’re anything like me, you’ve got a huge sweet tooth and absolutely love a good meal. Even something as simple as a strawberry refresher from Starbucks or one of Deeta’s donuts is something that can add a little something special to your day and make it a little bit more bearable. While it isn’t always healthy to eat food based off of your emotions, a few treats here and there is harmless. And, it’s a great way to start your morning off on the right note— refreshed and energized.
3. Give yourself a day off
Now look, I know it isn’t always realistic to take an entire day off. But, we also don’t need to be working 12 hours a day every day. Maybe choose one day a week or every two weeks to only do an hour of your homework. For the rest of your night, fill the time with things you actually want to do. You could go to a yoga class, watch tiktoks in bed for three hours straight, or go outside and play with your dog. What you do doesn’t matter, as long as it’s something that you’re passionate about and that makes you happy. The one thing I will say is don’t take naps. Please don’t kill me and wait to here me out. Naps are the worst. If you’re tired then just go to bed early; there is no shame in an 8 o’clock bedtime! Getting that extra sleep will allow your body to restore itself and you will feel energized in the morning (without the grogginess that comes from napping).
4. Have A Nighttime Routine
Speaking of sleep, it is very important to have a nighttime routine before you go to bed each night. For me, this is taking off my makeup and going through my skin care routine. This can look different for everybody. Some people like to shower, read a book, or even listen to music. Whatever it is, keep it consistent. By doing the same actions over and over again before you go to bed, you’re subconsciously training your brain to start winding down. By doing this, you will find that you spend less time tossing and turning in bed and more time getting those necessary zzz’s.
5. Go exercise
As someone who can be very lazy at times, I sometimes struggle with this one. But the reality is that exercising and working out is very effective at relieving stress. Whether it’s playing a sport, lifting weights, or taking your dog for a walk, try and find a short amount of time to do some physical activity. It doesn’t have to be anything overly time consuming or strenuous. Just the actions itself releases the chemical dopamine, which helps you feel happier and more relaxed. So get off the couch and get moving! It may be hard to do at first, but I promise afterwards you will feel so much better.
All of these tips have worked for me, and I hope that you can find them useful in your own life. Please let me know if you do find these helpful and let me know what you do in order to relax and de-stress. Because I certainly am in no shortage of stress, and could always use new suggestions 🙂
I totally agree with what you said about people trying to cram in self care when its a 24/7 job. To often we put in on the back burner because we think we don’t have time, but in reality when we are happy and less stressed we are more productive. Personally, I developed a skin cae routine (kind of like your #4) which requires me to put everything down and focus on me. VERY helpful. But espically as we get close to finals season and college decision season it’s important to think of yourselves and how we treat ourselves. Thanks for the tips!
I absolutely love parks and rec and was immediately attracted to this blog, and when I saw the real underlying issue, I realized the truth of your statement. Self-care is incredibly important and I do feel like often times people put it off for another time, when it should be a daily staple in one’s schedule. I never really thought about doing #4 but that actually seems like a great idea for the restless nights. #5 I feel like sometimes adds to the stress but being able to do it on your own accord does feel much more stress relieving. Light jogs or walking your dog can be incredibly helpful. My own suggestion seems a bit contradictory, but whenever I get really stressed I think about the worst thing that would happen if I stopped doing what I was doing, and normally, it’s not that bad. Maybe I might get a B if I stop editing a paper but is it really worth all the stress? Plus you can do this then wake up in the morning to complete work and feel more refreshed.
I LOVE PARKS AND REC. Tom is literally my favorite and I just adore the show all together. I love how you tied “Treat yo self” to the reality of self-care. I mean you’re right, you can’t cram self-care into one day (or go to Beverly Hills in one day too but go off Donna and Tom). Being a student athlete, I think finding time to relax and legit take a breath is really hard. Volleyball goes year round, school in the fall and then club going from winter to summer, it gets really stressful a lot of the time since I have to balance school and volleyball. I completely relate to what your blog was talking about which I thought was great. I loved how you gave some tips and ideas for self-care! I will definitely be trying those out. Also, Strawberry Acai Refresher with Lemonade is my favorite starbucuks too so digital high five. #5 is probably the biggest self-care thing for myself, and honestly exercising just relieves so much stress and in the end, I may be tired but I feel stronger and my mind feels awesome because I turned off Netflix and got moving. That’s one of the things I love about volleyball, it just gets me going! #1 and #3 are a bit harder to do, since our lives revolve around school and extra curriculars, but honestly, when there is a chance to do absolutely nothing, it feels so amazing. Overall I loved your blog!! You had some awesome information and tips about self-care, which also leads into destressing. I will definitely be trying out more of those tips!
Hey Emily, I loved your post! I think it is really important to understand that self-care is not something you can just cram into one day. It is really something that you should make time for in your everyday life. I know that I do this as well, but too often we put our self care on the back burner because we think there is more important things to do like our chores, work, or homework. But I can definitely say that when I do feel good about myself I am 100 times more productive. I also loved your tip about doing nothing, no matter how simple it is sometimes it is the best thing you can do. After a long hard week there is nothing more I want to do then sit alone in my room watching Netflix, I don’t want to go be social with friends, I just need some me time and it is important to realize that that is totally ok!
I have never seen Parks and Rec and everyone has been yelling at me for it. I think I’ll actually watch it now after reading your introduction because it sounds hilarious. For the topic of self-care, I have been doing this a lot recently. There is so much going on that it is beneficial to take a break from everything, but the problem is that it stops becoming a distraction and turns into avoidance for me. I will sit for hours coloring and watching tv, trying to give my mind a break, but it becomes difficult to get back into the working mindset. Do you have any tips for that? Should I just send it and completely switch back to working, or would it be better to slowly transition back to homework? I do agree with all of your tips for ways to destress, and it is also very hard for me to get up and actually go exercise. But I definitely follow the nighttime routine. It used to help, but I have been having trouble sleeping recently so I may need to switch it up. I really enjoyed reading about this topic and thank you for the advice!
Hey Ally, I’m glad my advice could help you. For me, I’ve gotten better at just going straight from relaxing back to work. So I would first try making the direct transition from one to the other for at least a few weeks to see if it works for you. If not, then yes I would try making it more gradual. Hope this helps!
I think that the topic of this post is very important but often overlooked. Self care is a relatively simple step that can improve mental health but it is put to the sidelines a lot. It is easy to get caught up in the business that our lives often revolve around. You have to go to school, get good grades, have good relationships with your parents, have close friends, and all those other little activities. Although all of these things are important, taking care of oneself is critical to being able to do anyhting else. I like how you broke it into five steps so that those who struggle with this have a way to try out a self care plan. And yes, I (probably like many others), often try to cram self care into one day. It was a good reminder to hear that self care needs to be more than just this.
In your own life, what is your go-to form of self care?
So glad to hear that my five steps helped you! In my own life, I love to de-stress by either watching tv or coloring. If I can, I also try to do hot yoga because it helps me loosen up physically and also relax mentally.