Given that we are currently in the peak season of gratitude, I’ve decided to do a complete 180 from the spitefulness of my last blog and spotlight the type of people who I believe have a special place waiting for them in heaven (or whatever higher power you believe in, heaven is just an arbitrary umbrella term in this context). In light of being realistic, I’ve split up my list into two categories: people who I have never met in my life (and probably never will), and those who I do know in my own life (some of these could even be me, who knows 😙).
A list of people who I have absolutely zero connection to, but hope to have the opportunity to dearly thank sometime in the future (then again, six degrees of separation!!):
New York City’s urban planner (or the entire committee, if it was more than one person)
New York City is gorgeous for many reasons, but in particular, I love its layout. Every street has been a) named so wonderfully conveniently (like c’mon, the avenues and streets system??) and b) placed perfectly perpendicularly to each other. If you go onto Google Maps and check out the aerial view of Manhattan specifically, you’ll see how beautifully the streets have been lined up. Whoever did the urban planning for this city, you deserve a raise. (Except if you’re also the same person who set up the NYC subway routes because those absolutely suck.)
Spotify’s founder (I just looked it up and apparently there are co-founders, but whatever – let’s assume that there’s only 1 very comfortable armchair in heaven)
No explanation needed for this one: Spotify is amazing; she’s an icon, she’s a legend, and she is the moment. Except, maybe cut back on the ad breaks? I know this is all a marketing scheme to convert everyone into Premium users, but at this point, it’s a little unethical how many ads are being ruthlessly shoved in between each song that I’m listening to.
Steve Jobs, or whoever made Airpods
I’m not super caught up on the whole timeline of Apple’s business strategy so I have zero idea who actually created Airpods, but what I do know is that whoever it is deserves everything in the world, and more. Apple, if you’re reading this (I know you are), please stop producing new versions- they’re getting unforgivably ugly.
A list of super cool people could could potentially be reading this blog right this moment, complete with alliteration (not to say that Stevie isn’t lurking on my WordPress):
College-Ruled-Paper Cherishers
College ruled paper is 109284082 times better than w*de ruled paper, and that statement is not up for debate. With the 4.3 total lines that w*de ruled paper offers, what can you even feasibly use it for? 20 bucks that a single haiku couldn’t even fit on there.
Dark-Green Defendants
As a society, we collectively despised the color green for a while in the mid 2010’s; if you were someone who still loved and adamantly stood by green during those times of unwarranted hatred, thank you. You are a trailblazer in allowing everyone to enjoy the gorgeous hues of forest green in today’s day and age. (I’ll also give you credit for the resurgence of sage green, because it’s like, a dark light hue, if that makes sense?)
Mind you, punctuality in responses is appreciated, but don’t go overboard with it. If you respond too quickly to my text, you’re now paving way for a full-blown, real-time text conversation that I didn’t sign up for. On the other hand, if you wait a solid 3-5 business days before responding to an urgent question of mine, that’s considered a federal crime in my book. Kidding, I’m one of those people that will accidentally forget to respond for weeks on end- I’m working on it, I promise!!
Hair-Tie Hander-Outers
It’s an unspoken but widely accepted fact that once you lend someone a hair tie, you will never, ever, ever, get it back. If you’re someone who still offers hair ties to those who ask for one knowing that it’s gone for good, you are quite possibly one of the coolest people to exist. I truly wish you all the best in life.
Side note: This also applies to the people who actively make an effort to return hair ties that they’ve borrowed from others.
Geography Geniuses
The fact that you can name all 27 (26? Google gave me conflicting answers) countries in the EU off the top of your head and point to exactly where they’re located on an un-outlined map?? Incredible. Instead of counting sheep to fall asleep, you probably spend your nights memorizing every single geographical fact about Tanzania, and I fully support that. I can’t really tell you why I think geographic geniuses are genuinely so cool- maybe because I personally couldn’t even point out where the Atlantic Ocean is.
Lyric Listeners
Okay, this one is rather broad. I don’t mean just anyone who listens to music: I’m talking about music enthusiasts who take the time to actually listen to the lyrics of songs, especially for the slower/sadder ones. If you’re one of those people who go above and beyond to annotate the lyrics of certain songs, I hope you are the recipient of good karma for the rest of your life.
Tangentially, Genius contributors. I have zero comprehension skills, and your little notes on the Genius lyrics websites are absolute life-savers.
Oxford-Comma Optimists
If you use the Oxford comma, you deserve all the rainbows, butterflies, and happiness in the world. That’s all I have to say on this matter.
To conclude this highly politically accurate blog article, this is just a reminder that there are special places in heaven waiting for everyone, not only for those who fall into the above categories outlined by yours truly. Unless, of course, you are an anti Oxford comma user – enjoy your time with Hades in the underworld.
2 thoughts on “people who have a special place in heaven 👼”
I second pretty much all of these opinions. Also, I really appreciate how much personality each of your blog posts has. I’m going to respond to all of these individually because I’m bored and opinionated lol
NYC’s urban planner: yes. absolutely. 100%. I listen to this podcast called 99% Invisible and it’s about… a lot of different things, but my favorite episodes are the urban planning ones.
Spotify’s founder: there’s enough unethical stuff within Spotify (including not paying artists enough) that I don’t think most of the higher-ups in the company are going to heaven (not that I believe in heaven, but, like, theoretically). Whatever employee invented the “song radio” idea, though, and all the users who create super niche playlists – I have so much respect for them.
Airpod creator: ngl I disagree, but I don’t have Airpods so maybe they’re more convenient than I realize. Who knows.
College-ruled-paper cherishers: this is… an oddly specific hill to die on, but I respect the stubbornness
Dark-green defendants: I’m more of a trend-follower than a trend-setter for this, but yeah I love dark green. It’s really weird to me that colors can go in and out of fashion in general ngl
Rapid-but-not-too-rapid responders-of-text-messages: yeah these people are great but I absolutely cannot relate
Hair-tie hander-outers: I had someone that was like this in my 6th grade FACS class back when I had long hair and had to tie it back every time we cooked, and honestly that was a godsend
Geography geniuses: I follow this one guy on TikTok who can identify a few-month span of when any old globe was created based on the names/boundaries of countries on it. Absolutely incredible
Lyrics listeners: this one is me!! It actually started because I realized my freshman year that it was easier to hear songs in a loud classroom if I was looking at the lyrics at the same time, but I’ve become gradually more obsessed with good lyricism. Hozier has my entire heart.
Oxford-comma optimists: also me! I will never understand why people oppose the Oxford comma.
Hola BBane! I really enjoyed reading your blog. You take a stance (or multiple) and stand behind them firmly which I obviously admire. Let’s break down your claims one-by-one and see if your tastes match those of an outspoken, Asian, 6’5, talented, and smart adult—me.
Now although I haven’t been to NYC, I can definitely appreciate the architecture and the urban planning. It’s amazing to see that NYC preserved an area for Central Park, but it’s hard to believe that NYC’s transportation system is top-notch. I’ll have to go see for myself sometime in college hopefully.
Spotify is for sure one of the best applications out there. Especially if you have Spotify premium, you can play basically anything at any time. Plus, Spotify Wrapped is a genius marketing move from whoever made it.
Apple actually has a really interesting story. For the release of the first iPhone, they hosted the famous Apple presentation which I’m sure a lot of people have seen. However, the iPhone wasn’t actually fully functional for the presentation. Steve Jobs had to switch out phones, use fake signals, and a bunch of other stuff to make sure the presentation went smoothly. And because it did, the iPhone is one of the greatest inventions ever. I personally don’t have Airpods because I’m scared they would just fall out when going on a run (which is mainly when I would use them… so yeah).
College Ruled uses the same amount of paper for more lines. If people prefer wide ruled paper and don’t have any physical needs preventing them from using college ruled, I would love to have a discussion with you, just to see what’s up.
Although Dark Green is not my favorite color, I can appreciate it. It’s the color of life in this bleak world that we live in. Also, Dark Green on a dress looks really nice imo.
I’m pretty conditioned by my brother to respond fairly quickly to conversations because if he’s online, he will respond in an instant which I love. If I have a question, I want a quick response (that doesn’t mean a full-hour conversation needs to start from it, literally just a response). If YOU have a question and I respond quickly to answer it, I expect you to respond or at least stay on the line to receive my response. It’s a 2-way street. Long convos only take place when both people agree and I personally prefer them over call/ft. I will not willingly text for hours on end if I could be calling.
I cannot comment on hair ties but I’m sure I would 100% appreciate hair-tie-hander-outers if I used them.
Geography is big brain.
Lyrics are great and all but I 100% prefer rhythm. I’m not going to sit through the opening of the song if I don’t vibe with the rhythm. If the rhythm is good, I sit through and then focus on the lyrics (and if they’re catchy, I’ll try and sing them with lyrics open).
Teachers, students, and literally everyone should use the Oxford Comma. For some reason it’s not used for journalism because The North Star doesn’t use them… it’s weird.
To add one more person to the list: anyone who offers/initiates a time to have a long, deep conversation. If they’re willing to talk to you about life for a long time at a time that works for both of you, they’re a keeper, as a friend or for a relationship. I love long talks that can dig deep into who someone is and where they come from. I love stories and if I have the time, I will listen to every single one. But reciprocity is key, so both parties need to have similar values. It’s hard to come by, which is why I’m grateful for those people.
I second pretty much all of these opinions. Also, I really appreciate how much personality each of your blog posts has. I’m going to respond to all of these individually because I’m bored and opinionated lol
NYC’s urban planner: yes. absolutely. 100%. I listen to this podcast called 99% Invisible and it’s about… a lot of different things, but my favorite episodes are the urban planning ones.
Spotify’s founder: there’s enough unethical stuff within Spotify (including not paying artists enough) that I don’t think most of the higher-ups in the company are going to heaven (not that I believe in heaven, but, like, theoretically). Whatever employee invented the “song radio” idea, though, and all the users who create super niche playlists – I have so much respect for them.
Airpod creator: ngl I disagree, but I don’t have Airpods so maybe they’re more convenient than I realize. Who knows.
College-ruled-paper cherishers: this is… an oddly specific hill to die on, but I respect the stubbornness
Dark-green defendants: I’m more of a trend-follower than a trend-setter for this, but yeah I love dark green. It’s really weird to me that colors can go in and out of fashion in general ngl
Rapid-but-not-too-rapid responders-of-text-messages: yeah these people are great but I absolutely cannot relate
Hair-tie hander-outers: I had someone that was like this in my 6th grade FACS class back when I had long hair and had to tie it back every time we cooked, and honestly that was a godsend
Geography geniuses: I follow this one guy on TikTok who can identify a few-month span of when any old globe was created based on the names/boundaries of countries on it. Absolutely incredible
Lyrics listeners: this one is me!! It actually started because I realized my freshman year that it was easier to hear songs in a loud classroom if I was looking at the lyrics at the same time, but I’ve become gradually more obsessed with good lyricism. Hozier has my entire heart.
Oxford-comma optimists: also me! I will never understand why people oppose the Oxford comma.
Hola BBane! I really enjoyed reading your blog. You take a stance (or multiple) and stand behind them firmly which I obviously admire. Let’s break down your claims one-by-one and see if your tastes match those of an outspoken, Asian, 6’5, talented, and smart adult—me.
Now although I haven’t been to NYC, I can definitely appreciate the architecture and the urban planning. It’s amazing to see that NYC preserved an area for Central Park, but it’s hard to believe that NYC’s transportation system is top-notch. I’ll have to go see for myself sometime in college hopefully.
Spotify is for sure one of the best applications out there. Especially if you have Spotify premium, you can play basically anything at any time. Plus, Spotify Wrapped is a genius marketing move from whoever made it.
Apple actually has a really interesting story. For the release of the first iPhone, they hosted the famous Apple presentation which I’m sure a lot of people have seen. However, the iPhone wasn’t actually fully functional for the presentation. Steve Jobs had to switch out phones, use fake signals, and a bunch of other stuff to make sure the presentation went smoothly. And because it did, the iPhone is one of the greatest inventions ever. I personally don’t have Airpods because I’m scared they would just fall out when going on a run (which is mainly when I would use them… so yeah).
College Ruled uses the same amount of paper for more lines. If people prefer wide ruled paper and don’t have any physical needs preventing them from using college ruled, I would love to have a discussion with you, just to see what’s up.
Although Dark Green is not my favorite color, I can appreciate it. It’s the color of life in this bleak world that we live in. Also, Dark Green on a dress looks really nice imo.
I’m pretty conditioned by my brother to respond fairly quickly to conversations because if he’s online, he will respond in an instant which I love. If I have a question, I want a quick response (that doesn’t mean a full-hour conversation needs to start from it, literally just a response). If YOU have a question and I respond quickly to answer it, I expect you to respond or at least stay on the line to receive my response. It’s a 2-way street. Long convos only take place when both people agree and I personally prefer them over call/ft. I will not willingly text for hours on end if I could be calling.
I cannot comment on hair ties but I’m sure I would 100% appreciate hair-tie-hander-outers if I used them.
Geography is big brain.
Lyrics are great and all but I 100% prefer rhythm. I’m not going to sit through the opening of the song if I don’t vibe with the rhythm. If the rhythm is good, I sit through and then focus on the lyrics (and if they’re catchy, I’ll try and sing them with lyrics open).
Teachers, students, and literally everyone should use the Oxford Comma. For some reason it’s not used for journalism because The North Star doesn’t use them… it’s weird.
To add one more person to the list: anyone who offers/initiates a time to have a long, deep conversation. If they’re willing to talk to you about life for a long time at a time that works for both of you, they’re a keeper, as a friend or for a relationship. I love long talks that can dig deep into who someone is and where they come from. I love stories and if I have the time, I will listen to every single one. But reciprocity is key, so both parties need to have similar values. It’s hard to come by, which is why I’m grateful for those people.